Miss White has a message she would like the world to share.
The phrase Limited Edition, means just that.
Apparently, she does not have a spare 'whatever it is', under the counter, in a drawer or clutched between nylon clad buttocks just waiting for you.
Pulling out your bottom lip, batting your eyelashes or telling her, your wife will never forgive you, will not work because it is gone. No more.
Limited - restricted, confined, without scope; narrow.
Edition - form in which something is published.
Limited Edition, restricted amount of product.
It is not difficult, when it is gone, it is really gone. So having said that, why are we always hearing the same things?
'Oh , but I really liked it. It was a lovely , pinky, reddy orange and it really made my lips look nice. It was about three years ago. Are you sure you don't do it anymore?'
'I'm sorry, but you know that Limited Edition that was out this Christmas, have you still got any?'
'So does that mean you don't have anymore?'
'Are you sure you're not getting anymore in?'
'Oh, does that mean they will never, ever make it again?'
Yes it does. They will never, ever, ever make it again, nor do we have something that looks just like it, now go away stupid!
Friday, 21 May 2010
Thursday, 20 May 2010
The Rottweiler.
Whilst discussing the last post, Miss Marple reminded us of 4 glorious weeks one Christmas, when we were blessed with the temporary presence of 'The Rottweiler.'
Just to prove that not everyone is suited to life in Retail, we shall take a trip down memory lane.
A few years ago, a Christmas temp came to work with us. A Solicitor in the making, she was pleasant company and a very efficient temp, willing to jump through all the hoops needed to work with the public, except when roused.
Without explaining every situation, as they are to complex and lengthy, here are some of her best quotes.
'Do I look like your f******g psychiatrist, I'm not here to chat. Buy something or go.'
'If you poke me again I will break your finger, madam.'
'Forget it , shall I do us both a favour and get the manager so you can complain about me and I can get you banned?'
'So, you used all the lipstick and then you brought it back because it didn't last long enough? Does this sound as stupid to you, as it did to me, when you said it?'
'Sorry you want to return that present, because? ........ Oh yeah you're ungrateful, no I get it! Fine.'
'What, you think I am intimidated because you can read my name badge, get out!'
'Please, you say please when you ask for something.'
Sadly, she was asked to leave when she told a customer in a fur coat it was disgusting. We remember her fondly and like to imagine her eating murder's and rapists for breakfast.
Just to prove that not everyone is suited to life in Retail, we shall take a trip down memory lane.
A few years ago, a Christmas temp came to work with us. A Solicitor in the making, she was pleasant company and a very efficient temp, willing to jump through all the hoops needed to work with the public, except when roused.
Without explaining every situation, as they are to complex and lengthy, here are some of her best quotes.
'Do I look like your f******g psychiatrist, I'm not here to chat. Buy something or go.'
'If you poke me again I will break your finger, madam.'
'Forget it , shall I do us both a favour and get the manager so you can complain about me and I can get you banned?'
'So, you used all the lipstick and then you brought it back because it didn't last long enough? Does this sound as stupid to you, as it did to me, when you said it?'
'Sorry you want to return that present, because? ........ Oh yeah you're ungrateful, no I get it! Fine.'
'What, you think I am intimidated because you can read my name badge, get out!'
'Please, you say please when you ask for something.'
Sadly, she was asked to leave when she told a customer in a fur coat it was disgusting. We remember her fondly and like to imagine her eating murder's and rapists for breakfast.
Tuesday, 18 May 2010
Serious Thoughts.
It has always been my intention to write a blog that is a light hearted look at life on a Beauty Counter from the Consultants point of view, but with the very sad recent events in Manchester, the mood has turned sombre in the Hall of Plenty.
When not serving our customers, talk has turned to the subject of how vulnerable we in the service industry are. It is well documented that nurses, firemen, police are often attacked when performing their duty, however less well reported are the abuses upon those of us who pedal our wares to the public.
To many this is irrelevant, we are the face of big brands, not public servants dedicated to saving lives. Yet in the last 10 years alone, three shop workers have been murdered on the shop floor. In comparison to national statistics this is not a huge amount when you look at the numbers of people killed crossing the road, but for those of us that work in retail it is three too many.
Often unreported are the small attacks, the verbal, the physical and the mental. In 2010 we face a more and more the aggressive customer who feels it is their right to get what they want in spite of the consequences.
'She who must be Obeyed' experienced just that on Thursday night.
Whilst serving one customer, another arrived. Rather than wait till the first customer was finished the newcomer stomped to another counter and demanded someone serve her with our products. The unfortunate consultant explained that she was not familiar with our product but she would do her best. This was received with a volley of foul mouthed insults best suited to a touretts suffering, professional swear word creator for the Oxford English Dictionary.
'She who must be Obeyed' was lucky enough to have completed her sale and meet the pair heading back to our counter. After five minutes of abuse, the woman actually ordered what she wanted insisting she be served. She did not let up through out the entire time.
Approached by our valiant floor manager, the customer was informed that we did not have to serve her at all and that swearing was not the ideal way to receive first class service. Apparently the customer didn't care and left with her items in a cloud of abuse.
This is just one story amongst the hundreds we have to deal with day in day out and it is getting more frequent.
One theory is that consumer programmes give people a false sense of their own rights, not the ones where someone is clearly being ripped off or abused, but the ones that say, 'You can bargain over the price.'
Because you see, white goods do have a negotiable profit margin but mascara doesn't.
Another theory is that the 'Gimme more' type customer is not used to hearing , no.
On our counter, we have decided that some people are just rude.
However, until the industry itself recognises that it's representatives are not consumer punching bags to be undermined as soon as a customer shouts loud enough, I fear we will always be abused in some way.
When not serving our customers, talk has turned to the subject of how vulnerable we in the service industry are. It is well documented that nurses, firemen, police are often attacked when performing their duty, however less well reported are the abuses upon those of us who pedal our wares to the public.
To many this is irrelevant, we are the face of big brands, not public servants dedicated to saving lives. Yet in the last 10 years alone, three shop workers have been murdered on the shop floor. In comparison to national statistics this is not a huge amount when you look at the numbers of people killed crossing the road, but for those of us that work in retail it is three too many.
Often unreported are the small attacks, the verbal, the physical and the mental. In 2010 we face a more and more the aggressive customer who feels it is their right to get what they want in spite of the consequences.
'She who must be Obeyed' experienced just that on Thursday night.
Whilst serving one customer, another arrived. Rather than wait till the first customer was finished the newcomer stomped to another counter and demanded someone serve her with our products. The unfortunate consultant explained that she was not familiar with our product but she would do her best. This was received with a volley of foul mouthed insults best suited to a touretts suffering, professional swear word creator for the Oxford English Dictionary.
'She who must be Obeyed' was lucky enough to have completed her sale and meet the pair heading back to our counter. After five minutes of abuse, the woman actually ordered what she wanted insisting she be served. She did not let up through out the entire time.
Approached by our valiant floor manager, the customer was informed that we did not have to serve her at all and that swearing was not the ideal way to receive first class service. Apparently the customer didn't care and left with her items in a cloud of abuse.
This is just one story amongst the hundreds we have to deal with day in day out and it is getting more frequent.
One theory is that consumer programmes give people a false sense of their own rights, not the ones where someone is clearly being ripped off or abused, but the ones that say, 'You can bargain over the price.'
Because you see, white goods do have a negotiable profit margin but mascara doesn't.
Another theory is that the 'Gimme more' type customer is not used to hearing , no.
On our counter, we have decided that some people are just rude.
However, until the industry itself recognises that it's representatives are not consumer punching bags to be undermined as soon as a customer shouts loud enough, I fear we will always be abused in some way.
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