Happy New Year!!!

New Year has arrived, hurrah!
 In the spirit of renewal and consideration of the year past, I have decided to re-post my favourite blog from 2010, Lamb Chops. Strangely enough, New Years Eve brought a rush of  mutton based make overs at the make up counters.Shoring up a face lift that resembled Laura Ashley swags made me think of this and I would like to share my best of 2010 with you, Happy New Year and may 2011 be a prosperous one to you all XX


Ah, Mutton Season.
The sun has emerged bringing with it that rarest of customers, Mutton and not just the desperate divorcee in her teenage daughters clothes. We are talking hard core, sinewy Mutton, the aged gold digger gone to seed.
Stick thin pensioner's that force new hips into skinny jeans, teetering carefully on expensive designer platforms, false nails clattering in delight at the Cruise wear Corals arrayed across the counters.Fluttering ancient blue lids at the almost dead Sugar Daddy to obtain the latest trendy lipstick, they smear haphazardly across augmented lips.
False breasts strain against delicate grey skin, like bowling balls in 10 denier tights, as they peruse the skincare, hoping that cellulite creams will support the flappy buttocks years of dedicated anorexia has left.
With carefully constructed hair, they totter from counter to counter catching up with the latest trends, veneers glinting in the store lights, manipulated snouts sniffing out the most extreme , most expensive items, dead Daddy can buy.
These women will grip on to youth, harder than Ranulph Fiennes in crampons on the North Face.
A secret pleasure for us is to bleat as they pass by, alerting our colleagues to whip out the most expensive or garish of items at the Fountain of Youth in the Hall of Plenty.