Chaos at the tills!!!!

Sometimes the Hall of Plenty is awash with utter chaos. Like yesterday....

Watching Dippy Peacock struggle with a bunch of metallic balloons shaped as lips was a guilty pleasure for us all. Like an extremely camp version of the balloon seller in Mary Poppins, the poor lamb had to attach them to his display stand and was only saved from drifting three floors to ladies wear by the timely intervention of a colleague.

Somebody on one of the counters perforated their own eardrum with a cotton bud in a freak accident that even I, with my varied imagination, cannot quite comprehend. Apparently, she had it in her hand as she emptied a bin bag and it managed to go down her ear canal as she stood back up.....?

 What are the chances of that happening, like EVER?

Slipper Mouth managed to insult one of the new consultants in a gaffe I have yet to get to the bottom of.

A woman tried to bring back an eye pencil to us that had clearly been used, I could kind of tell by the way it had no point and a cat hair stuck to it, but she insisted that it hadn't. Even if I was to believe her, the fact that she was wearing it as she was talking to Miss Marple and I made me just a tiny bit Captain Peacock and we sent her away.

A rambling idiot entertained (frightened) us all for a brief while at lunch time. She was beeping and walking backwards, staring at people then smiling for longer than was strictly necessary. Yes, she may have been autistic but from the size of her pupils I think it was more chemical than genetic.

 And where were security at this time?
They were pushing water bottles stuck on a stick to customers trapped for forty minutes in one of the lifts!

Our till then decided to act like something from Poltergeist by randomly displaying the number 2 over and over again until it gave up and crashed, and two customers wanted to try on lipsticks at five minutes to closing, then complained because we hurried them even though the store was closed.

After being trapped behind the counter by an overexcited Twiddle Blink,  who wanted to check she still had an appointment for her prom and cross questioned me about who was going to do her make up, and having bronzer shoved in my face by a woman with a silly high pitched voice, I was ready to lie down on the floor and just wait till Monday.

It has been known for the cleaners to discover the dried out carcasses of Consultants that have crawled under the counters to die.